January 2012
20 posts
I'm on a train..I'm on a motherfuckin train.
You know what would be awesome?
If I could get through this day without fucking crying.
4 tags
My latest project →
I started yet another blog-“I Used to be Fun”. I needed a place to vent about my health and eating issues. If you are interested in such things, please follow it, and tell your celiac, diabetic, health-obsessed work-out obsessed friends too!
My inner snark has been out and proud all over today. Want to be kind. Want to be good. Want to not hate people who are successful. Need to make my life what I want it to be instead of wishing everyone else’s was just as miserable. oh boo.
2 tags
So I just discovered that if you don’t have xanax or a paper bag-breathing with a paper napkin over your nose will do the trick during a panic attack.
Every second counts.
My Subconcious was on a roll last night...
I’m feeling all sorts of not good about myself right now due to some weird eye infection, a zit the size of texas that has been on my face for a MONTH (no, really) and a disgusting cold sore that won’t get better. My body is in some sort of immunity crisis and I’m sure it has a lot to do with all the shit I put into it over the holidays. Either way, this is the dream I had last...
3 tags
On getting a Mammogram
All you need is an email with the subject line “MY BOOBS ARE FINE”, and nothing else, to make a bad day good.
On Giving Good Advice
Her: “You are right. Why is your head on so straight and mine is so screwed up?
Me: “Because none of this is happening to ME!”
December 2011
12 posts
although, if someone had a party where they played...
Douche Year's Eve
I swear to God, every year I say I’m going the fuck FAR away for New Years, but it has yet to happen.
I don’t really care that much about New Years Eve. I have cared, but as I get older and more curmudgeonly, I honestly don’t give a flying fuck what I’m doing as long as I’m with at least one other person that I love. That’s it.
I am also not a resolution-y...
I refuse to watch that Zooey Deschanel/Joseph Gordon Leavitt video. I am just pretending that it doesn’t exist.
On Dating Someone Outside of Your Borough
Her: “Imagine the worst place you could ever live, and that is where he is from”
Me: “Bay Ridge? Queens? Park Slope? I’ve got it…the UPPER EAST SIDE!”
Her: “Nope, nope nope nope.”
Her: “Jersey City”.
Oh.
I'm gonna start Tumblring again. That is all.
January 2011
2 posts
December 2010
1 post
Did you know you like drum and bass?
This would be the question that my boyfriend asked me this morning, probably a little more amused at my blatant retardedness about music than I would like him to be. As much as I try to give off the appearance of being a hip older chick, I don’t think I’m fooling many.
And to be honest, I’m not sure how to answer that question. Because I’m still not sure I know what it...
September 2009
3 posts
An Advertising Shift Helps Blogs Survive as... →
(via nytimes.com)
My mother felt the need to cut this out of the Times and mail it to me. Thanks for reminding me why I still haven’t found a job, mother dear.
Diet Pepsi Contained Frog or Maybe Toad →
This just makes me sad for the frog. Dying a horrible death in a pool of caffeinated sugar water. Can’t wait til PETA starts targeting Pepsico as evil frog-killers.
Everybody is so make believe, it's true...I used...
August 2009
2 posts
There are certain things I just don't do. Because...
July 2009
28 posts
Yet Another Great Idea That Was Mine...That I Did... →
(via www.cozyjosie.com)
I have always wanted to open up some sort of dessert/wine bar in Brooklyn. Guess I’ll just have to become a patron of this one instead.
Dear Match.com
I noticed today that you slimy bastards went ahead and renewed my membership…charging me $75 of my hard-earned money that you are refusing to give me back.
I should be charging YOU for the last six months of my life that I will never get back…meeting the dregs of humanity; men who can’t fuck, men who are 40 who only want to date 25 year olds, men who are broken and damaged...
Drunk people in Yoga positions →
nickmcglynn:
(via:blakeley:obomobo)
Another Day, Another Shooting →
This is the THIRD shooting in my neighborhood in the last 2 weeks. And when I say my neighborhood, I don’t mean 20 blocks away. I mean, around the corner, on a block that I frequent several times a day. I’m glad it made the Times. It’s about time they started paying attention to what goes on around here.
I have a big nose.
asie:
(via brianvan)
PEERRRSSSIANNN
Mine is of the Lebanese variety. But a big nose all the same.